I trust you….
I trust you
The clouds trust the trees trust
the stone, the centipede,the grass, they all trust
all these ones changing and growing and dieing
all these ones helpless to the ways they transform they all trust
they breathe, they trust
they form, they trust
they wither, they trust
I know that they do because they all keep going, beautiful, dignified, in their owns nature
and I trust
and I keep going
how could I wake up if I didn’t?
how could I love if I didn’t?
how could I dream or eat or shit or make mistakes if I didn’t?
what reason would there be for any of it- for long nights-for missed dawns- tobacco stains
why keep refilling the cup?
When i am shaken, when my mind lapses into a place where there is never enough and I am lost and no one ever finds me and no one even looks….
then my feet do it for me bless them
then my hands do it for me bless them
when I am weary
then my heart is still doing it for me
each beat for faster or slower
loving because tomorrow and yesterday depend on it
trusting because I am wired that way
before hard hands
before adult desires transposed on child skin
before I was even an I or such an I that words became bullets and not bridges and arms became soldiers and not nurses
I was much alike the wolves and the leaves and chili peppers and large and small waters
and I trusted
I thought that I lost that love that i am
I thought sideways looks and hidden blades were what I was and not what I did
but alas, tides change without my scheduling them
and inside of me
who I am began to rumble
and in great waves and in small steps and in tumbles backwards downhill rol
without my facilitation, something changed or changed back
and that is a very simple thing
and also a very big deal
really the biggest deal
for someone who was ready to fall
out and away
and stood up
by the many hands of God (s)
so that i
might have this oppurtunity
to trust you.
I trust you.